“Just keep looking at it, Molly! We don’t want to lose where it is! Mom!!!! I have something to show you!”
The sweet sounds of my children playing in the yard.
In Ohio, we had a neighbor who would purposefully bring his dog into our yard and let it poop. Once he brought the dog on its leash into our backyard and had it poop under my kids’ swingset. I didn’t notice until Molly fell off the swingset and fell headfirst into the pile.
Over the years my annoyance at this neighbor bad behavior grew and grew and it doesn’t escape me that at the top of the list of things I don’t miss from Ohio is that neighbor and his dog poop.
While I worked through “WWJD” and “Jesus, who is my neighbor?” as it applies to dog poop ninjas, I could fling the piles into the small patch of woods behind our house. When they lined our drive with them, I could scoop it up and give a really satisfying poop catapult launch back into their drive. Despite the returning to sender and the many times I stood and glared at him while he stood in our yard with his dogs on the leash letting them do their dirty duty, and even the times I passive aggressively yelled about it from my yard, this man never stopped. I never did find the courage to go address it to him face to face, because although his wife was friendly, not one time in the nearly 9 years we lived there did that man smile at me, speak to me even to return a greeting or even acknowledge me. He carried an air about him that made me quite sure if I addressed it to him face to face it would not be in the best interest of my safety or that he would find an even worse way to retaliate. However, then we moved and all’s well that ends well with that story.
In Virginia, our personal promised land, our grass is green, our neighborhood is peaceful, and the kids can ride their bikes in the street. It seems, though, that in Virginia, just as in Ohio, dogs feel no respect for dog free families and their yards. Pretty much everyone near our house has a dog, so I can’t even narrow it down to which dog has left a gift. Since I can’t figure out which dog is donating its gifts to us, I don’t know where to fling the poo. Also, there are no woods lining our yard here. So I take it and either have to walk all the way to the dead end and toss it in the creek or toss it in the little tunnel thing that goes under our drive to help with drainage. Neither is an appealing option, since the first involves me carrying poop on a shovel down the street dry heaving at top volume and the second moves the poop from sight, sun and step, but still I know it’s there, lurking beneath my drive.
In Virginia’s defense this only happens maybe 5-8 times during the warm weather months, but that’s 5-8 times too many. There is no other time that I hope no one who thinks I’m classy and decent drives by as when I have to clean up some one else’s dog poop. I certainly cannot be held accountable for my attitude towards man or beast when in such a situation.
I will end this with my status update which I posted and then decided I had many more thoughts about this than could be addressed with the brevity of a Facebook post. When I get to heaven I certainly expect that Jesus will be giving me a pass on this one…
Many people talk about this verse, but they don’t talk about the rest of it. Today’s verse of the day is….
Matthew 39:12 Love your neighbor as yourself…..but your neighbor’s dog, all I’m saying is if I’d wanted to clean up dog poop, I woulda gotten my own dog.