A few years ago I resolved to run a 5k. I didn’t want to walk it or run/walk it. I wanted to run the whole thing from start to finish.
I’d worked hard in the months leading up to that New Year’s Day to lose weight and had some pretty proud moments. I was certain if I stuck with it I could do this. So one cold January morning, in Ohio, where it makes this Virginia chill look like a balmy beach vacation, I took to the roads.
My knees ached. My lungs screamed. My neighbors watched out the windows.
I ran 1 mile and made it back to the house where I drank 64 gallons of water and nearly died on our recliner.
Oh. Running is hard.
A couple of months later, my friend Heather asked me to lead off her Autism Run which she coordinated. It was so special to have that moment be in support of such a lovely friend and her sweet son. I completed that 5k….but I walked part of it. Not exactly what I was looking for.
A few months after that I ran my second 5k. What a thrill! I ran the entire thing and in victory celebration…I barfed off behind the football bleachers. Because, oh yeah, running is hard. I was super lucky to win a Nike hat that time.
Well, at that point I figured I was pretty much a pro at the running thing so my next goal was to run a trail 5k. I sort of think I was trying to break my ankles and be done with running, because that is super possible when you’re running like slanty on wet hills with every gnat in our small town biting your legs the whole way. Not only did I run run that entire race, but I beat my best time and dropped my time under 30 minutes, which for me was huge. And then I barfed again.
I had accomplished what I’d set out to do. For the first time ever I had completed my New Years Resolution. It was an incredible feeling. Well, not the barfing part, but the rest of it felt awesome.
Usually I set vague resolutions that weren’t particularly quantifiable. This year I will be nicer to my brothers. This year I will keep my notebooks neater. This year I will be a better wife. This year I will lose *coughcough* pounds. This year I will eat some pudding. I mean, just sort of like general, sure, this year is gonna be super cool and all that.
Last year, though it felt very much like all the rest…a statement made that couldn’t be quantified or qualified….I decided that in 2017 I wanted to know God in a new deeper way. My friends, at the end of 2017, I can tell you that on more than one occasion did I find myself so overcome by the adrenaline rush of what God had done in my life that I was certain I might be right back behind those bleachers hoping no one would see me losing my lunch.
2017 has been an incredible year. Incredible. I can’t even begin to put it all down and keep it to a reasonable length. But suffice it to say this, for the second time, I kept a New Year’s Resolution. But really, I think I had very little to do with that one.
A few months ago I gave myself a writing challenge. A couple of weeks ago I knew my 2018 resolution would be to finish this writing project. I thought a few times wouldn’t it be neat to finish it before the ball dropped, to be so ahead of the game that I didn’t even have to wait for a new year to accomplish my goals. But alas, midnight came and went, and I was far closer than I anticipated, but still not finished.
My fears were probably right. I wouldn’t finish it until February and that is IF I don’t give up.
But at 1:45 this afternoon on January 1st, I finished my project. For the third time I have met my New Year’s Resolution and this time in RECORD time. I am officially the New Year’s winner!
It felt like a goal I thought I’d never meet, but I did.
And I recognize that this may not be the most interesting post I’ve ever written, but dang it, I’m writing it anyway, because when I started this blog….it was because my pastor looked at me and said “Sarah Kinzer. The writer. Keep writing.” And it felt like a vague New Year’s Resolution. You can read about it in that first post I wrote… Been Some Time
I’ve written and I’ve posted. I’ve journaled and I’ve put together papers and sermons for classes. But today I feel like I followed that advice finally.
And that makes for a darn good feeling.
I am intensely proud of myself today.
And I didn’t even throw up.